So like I hoped this year might be different, but alas the grief is kicking in again.
So I am withdrawing deep inside myself, as that is how I handle myself and my emotional responses to people and situations.
I am lacking the desire to want to talk to people at all if I am honest. It isn't anything personal, I just don't feel conversational. I mean maybe I just need a quick brake to let my mind work itself out.
As some do know, I don't know how to handle grief really, some people tell me that I should talk about it, explain how I feel and stuff. It doesn't work for me, I have tried it a lot. I can't explain what I do not understand. And I really don't understand why these two blocks of grief, the one that hits me in July and this one keep coming back, and why they still hurt and make me feel alone.
Just confusing.
So sorry people, I am going to go and allow my head to work its way through it again. Just wish I knew how to make sense of what is in my head at these times. I have tried talking through it, very much, but it doesn't work for me, at all. I just need some time and space to work myself out again.
Grief is unique to us all.
