I am not going to name people, but I have witnessed the fallout of two relationships today. From people who I care about.
It has made me think about things, and how they ended for me and Alex back in February. Break ups are never clean. There is always some residual emotional bound. Sometimes we can turn them into great and wonderful friendships. Other times they fester and become bitter.
I believe that we have so much potential as a race, to either love or hate someone. Sometimes we develop feeling we can't quite explain for others. And no matter what we do we have to find ways to deal with them. There is a a few people, I have some strong level of emotional feelings for. I am unsure how I should deal with this at all. To be honest it seems scary how I can feel for people when they haven't really given me any kind of a sign. Or because they have given me mixed singles.
I am not sure about many things right now. It doesn't help because I know that in 3/4 months I am being uprooted. I am going to move to Milton Keynes, I know I have no other option, but to move there, and it will only be for just under a year, before I move to Sheffield for University. So that is all good I guess. And fingers crossed I might be able to get a job as a healthcare assistant and maybe learn to drive.
But my heart is always going to belong in the Midlands, it truly is in your blood. And After 13 years I am going home. Some part of me feels excited and happy that I am kind of getting back to that area. And I think that my heart will end up going to a person in that area. I know that it is kind of true, most of the above people are from that area, I just know that it will happen.
Just hope that I actually get paid this week, I really need a short holiday...
